Boring is sometimes best.

When I was first starting to really take myself seriously as a writer (as in writing every day and trying to actively get published), I remember thinking that I was way too boring to write anything exciting. I mean, I don't do drugs, or get black out drunk every night. I don't go wild and travel through dangerous areas in the dead of night. Hell, I think the most dangerous thing I do on a regular basis is walk into my bookshelf nearly every morning when I'm getting ready for work because despite nearly a year of it being in the same place, it's always a surprise!

I grew up with stories about the wild antics of writings, with the motto 'write drunk, edit sober.' I always thought I was too much of a bore to fit in, but what I've found over the last few years has been the opposite. Schedules actually help me keep at my writing more than any sort of wild life ever could. Knowing that I'm home by 4 every day and sticking to the schedule lets me prepare to write. It's become a habit now. I don't have to sit and wait to be inspired to write, it's simply 4:00 and time to write.

Now clearly not every day works out in an ideal way, but having a steady life where I am not totally clueless about what's coming next helps keep me grounded. When I'm not stressing about what's going to happen tomorrow (or where I'm going to get my next fix) keeps me focused on the story at hand. I've fond that the only real way to get any writing accomplished is really simple: sit on your butt (or stand at your standing desk) and write. There's nothing else that puts the words into the world. Not talking about writing, not daydreaming, not reading. At the end of the day the only way to write is.... to write.

And a boring, stable life helps that happen.

Now, that doesn't mean you have to keep a boring life in all aspects. Try new things, travel to new places, eat weird food that you can't pronounce, and do things that scare you, but never feel like having a stable life is a disadvantage when it comes to being creative.

Valentine for Writers

The image of the writer locked away in a dark room pounding away on the keyboard is one that's always been embedded in my head. And for a good reason, I mean, writing doesn't get done except by some solitary confinement with a writing implement of some sort.

Today is Valentine's Day and, for a lot of people, that means spending the day with their loved one(s) (or alternatively complaining about a lack of loved one(s)). This holiday in particular reminds me that writing isn't just a solitary effort. Yes, the act of writing generally happens alone, but writers don't have to be alone. 

I think that love and support is one of the most important things that a writer can find. Having a supportive group who helps on the days when you don't want to type another word, or who tells you that million dollar story idea you had about a bear who finds love with a hunter might not be such a good plan.

Writers need that.

That's one of the reasons I love living in this age of digital connection. I'm very lucky to have a very supportive family, and a great group of friends who support me, and believe in me. But I find people online all the time who don't have that, and who are reaching out into the webs of interspace to find it, hoping someone will reach back.

Maybe it's in the #amwriting tag on twitter. Maybe it's on a forum board. Maybe it's through putting up fan fiction. Maybe it's through Nanowrimo.

But finding that is a vital and important part of writing. Writing is lonely, and it's hard. Ripping up pieces of your heart and spreading them on a page in a finger painting you hope someone else will understand can make a person a wee bit off after some time, and sometimes it's easy to lose your way and wander through this writing world lost and confused.

That's where a loving, firm hand is great to have to help pull you up and whisper, 'You can do it.'

So happy Valentine's Day to everyone out there and an especially big hug to everyone I'm blessed to call friend!

Tabletops and Storytelling

I was really late to the part with tabletop gaming. While I played once or twice in college, it never really clicked until after college when I joined a small group that played together once every two weeks or so.

That group made of only 4 people (3 players and one dungeon master) hooked me and I've been playing regularly ever since. I've even run a few campaigns of my own and have always enjoyed the adventures that can be built through storytelling and dice rolling. But one thing I've really been noticing more and more is how playing tabletop games has taught me a lot about storytelling and what makes a compelling tale. 

Let's start by defining what a tabletop game is. A tabletop game (like Dungeons and Dragons) is a game played with a group of players and led by a dungeon master. The dungeon master controls the enemies, and the general plot, but a good DM (Dungeon Master) will work with the players to tell a collabrative story. It requires a lot of imagination and innovation on all parts. The game is played by rolling dice to determine successes or failures. Combat is done in a similar way. You see a flash of Dungeons and Dragons at the very, very beginning of Stranger Things. 

So what can you learn about storytelling through a tabletop game? Lots. Here are 5 things I've learned over the years.

1. Little details can matter a lot.
I love when a random towns person you discover suddenyl becomes important to the plot later. Or if you discover a strange item that is suddenly very useful 7 or 8 games later. Tie the little details into the big picture and watch the story become a huge, steady narrative arc instead of disjointed mini-adventures. 

2. The first thing you think of is not always the best option.
The first idea you have to solve a puzzle, or get out of a dungeon is usually not the best option. Dig deep, think to the next option then the next then the next. Push yourself to not go with the obvious but to go with the subtle, the outlandish and the unexpected. 

3. You can fail at things you're amazing at. 
Nothing is more frustrating when your master assassin rolls a failure for a sneak attack. Something your character is literally trained to be the best at and you fail. It sucks, but it's also true in stories. Sometimes the hero fails at something that should be second nature. Things go wrong and the unexpected happens. How your character handles those failures is what builds them into something unforgettable. 

4. You can excel at things you're terrible at. 
Sometimes the huge minotaur in plate armor rolls an instant success on sneaking into a room. Just because your character is terrible at something doesn't mean they have to instantly fail at it, sometimes the unexpected works in your favor and that leads your character into new situations where you'll have to think fast to not die immediatly. 

5. Stories have multiple paths, your choices impact the tale you tell. 
Even with a set path of adventure, the choices your character makes along the way shape what the tale will be like. If you're in a cursed city filled with vampires and dread, you can still have a comedy on your hands if that's how the chraracters interact with the world. The characters create the interaction and build the 'flavor' of the story. Use that wisely. 

I love playing in my tabletop campaigns and every time I leave the game filled with a renewed sense of inspiration for my own work. Telling a story with a group of people all working together builds a unique and incredible tale that can be totally different every, single time and that is a whole new kind of magic that I can get behind. 

How To Write When The World Is Overwhelming

Many creative people are in tune with the world around them. The hurts, pains and injustices of the world cut deep and the sense of overwhelm can swallow you whole like being washed under in the tides of a hurricane-churned sea. It can be so easy to get washed away and stop creating. But for me, creating is how I find my footholds in the world again. It's how I find meaning and make sense of things that feel senseless. It's how I restore myself and find the strength to move forward. 

But when the world has gone mad around you, when you are dealing with difficult personal problems that threaten to consume your whole focus, how do you make the time to create? I've found these 5 things help me carve out the time and space I need to still feel human, to not get lost in hopelessness. 

1. List out what you can do.
I live by my to-do list in my bullet journal and when things get overwhelming what helps is putting just one thing onto that list. It can be as simple as making a phone call. I add that to my list and knock it off. It gives me an instant boost of 'I can do something' and helps cancel out the feelings of hopelessness. 

2. Get physical. 
I'm not a terribly physical person, but I love going on walks and doing yoga. When I get really lost in my head I pop on a youtube video (I love Yoga with Adrienne) and give myself 10-20 minutes of focusing on my breathing and moving my body. Forcing me to concentrate on how I am moving, takes me out of my head and into a more physical space. It gives me the distance to catch my breath and get a breather from the noise of my endlessly flowing thoughts. Give yourself permission to do something that forces you to move and think about anything else. 

3. Create in a new way. 
Writing has always been my 'thing,' The creative outlet that calls my name. But lately I've enjoyed coloring. Find a new way to be creative and flex those thnking muscles in new ways! Always loved painting? Try writing a sonnett. Been a poet your whole life? Try writing a personal esay. Give yourself the chance to branch into other creative expressions. Bob Ross is on Youtube now so paint some happy trees.

4. Walk away. 
Sometimes, the best thing you can do is unplug and walk away. It's easy to get stressed out by staying on social media so sign off and take an afternoon to do something else. Go to dinner with friends, visit your closest national park and explore, paint your nails, sing karaoke. Go do something away from the source of your stress. It will still be there when you get back, but being on alert 24/7 is just going to burn you out. Take time for self-care even if it's as simple as taking a long shower or enjoying a hot cocoa and a book.

5. Reach out. 
Sometimes the best thing you can do is admit you're not okay and to reach out for help. Talk to friends and family if you can. Find online communities you can talk to, and never be afraid to get professional help. There is no shame in needing help and taking the steps to get what you need to continue being a healthy human. 

6. Find something that makes you laugh. 
Laughter is powerful and you should try to find ways to enjoy that medicine. Find some silly youtube videos or ridiculous games and just embrace the silliness. Watch your favorite comedy, invite your friends over and have a funny story circle. Laugh deeply and truly. 

Those are just some ways to find some hope and light when the world feels heavy and overwhelming. You have to take care of yourself. I believe in you. 

Shake It Up For Inspiration

Maintaining a creative life is a balancing act. Between making the time for all your creative work, trying to get the word out about your works, and doing that whole living thing it can be a challenge to make it work. For me, to make it work, it's meant finding a routine and sticking to it. Habits are incredibly powerful things. Most of our lives on built on these small day-to-day actions that we barely notice happening. 

But while habits are amazing. Sometimes, particularly during blocks, you need to shake things up and do something new, something that pushes you out of your comfort zone and fills you with wonder. To create you need to feed your creative well with experiences that bring amazement, joy, and a tinge of fear. New adventures fill like a breath of fresh air after years underwater. It stretches and refills our creative energy. 

For a long time I doubted the power of these moments, of what stepping out of my comfort zone would mean, but when I took the leap it led to me finding a new love in ice skating. Nothing fills me with as much joy as going on a trip to the ice rink (which is not exactly a dime a dozen in Atlanta). Taking that one chance (on a day job outing no less!) has shown me new ways to experience the world. It's encouraged me to try other things and to get up after wiping out. 

I take pride in the bruises that come from my tumbles. Those blooming black and blue markings tell a story of taking a chance, of laughing and of wonder. 

Your challenge for the week is to do one thing you've always thought about trying. Make the appointment, buy the ticket. Take a chance and watch how you grow. 

Don't Forget The Hows

I'm a hardcore goal setter. I love planners, my bullet journal, and the feel of the perfect pen in my hand. I can write out every task I have, check them off and keep on rolling. I see what I want and I mark it out on my calendar of when I want to accomplish it by. There's just one problem... I don't make myself a road map on getting there. 

See I'm great at the what and the when. I know what I want and know when I want it by but I don't put together the how. So, I want to submit a short story for an anthology and their deadline is Feb. 28. I want to send in a story. I know that I need to have it finished early enough to get edited so I plan to have a draft done by the end of Jan. to give me time to get a beta reader (or two) and get edits in.

I plan to submit my story by Feb. 20 so I have some wiggle room in my timeline if something gets thrown out of whack or a beta reader takes a little long to get back to me. That's awesome. It's great to have that laid out on my color coordinated planner. But what that plan doesn't take into account is how am I going to get that story written? 

Clearly I'm going to write it one word at a time but when? 

What I've found is that as my life gets busier, I keep making goals but take less time to worry about the steps between me and achievement. I want to skip to the good stuff and leave out all that pesky middle nonsense. But the middle nonsense is where the work happens and what really matters. The middle is the day-to-day that builds everything about our future. 
So now that I'm not ignoring that or magically hoping it all just kind of sorts itself out. Instead I've started figuring out the steps. What does that look like? 

Well it looks like me reviewing my commitments and building in time to work on these goals. If I want to finish this 7000 word story by the end of Jan. that's about 500 words a day. Now I have a measurable goal. Next, I figure out the times I have to write. Well, my days are pretty booked but I do get up early so I'll write first thing in the morning. 

Just by adding those two little bits of information already my goal feels a lot closer than it did before. Now I have a timeframe and a better idea of when I can get everything done. It sounds a little anal and type-A but I really have found that creating a plan helps keep me on track without getting so overwhelmed by all the things on my list. 

So, here's your task for the day, find a task you've been 'meaning to do' and set an exact time you're going to deal with it. It's even more fun if you give a ridiculous time like 7:13 and promise to work for at least 25 minutes. See what you can finally get knocked off your list and then celebrate that rush of  success. 

Seven Steps To Querying

So you've decided to look for an agent. Yay! Welcome to the club! It's an exciting step to decide to go the more traditional route and start the querying process. It's also a bit overwhelming and a little scary. There's a lot of information and it can feel a bit hard to decide where to even start. So let's do this thing! 

Party dog believes in you! You can do the thing, write all the words and send out all the queries! 

Step One: 
Polish Up Your Manuscript!

That's right, step one is not query. It's making sure you've got a badass manuscript ready to roll. I know it's so tempting when you type The End to ride off into querying land. But please, please, please, take your time. Polish up your manuscript to the very best it can be. Pay particular attention to the first 50 pages since that's the first impression of your story. Do those pages draw a reader in or is there a lot of nothing happening? 

This is also a good time to figure out what genre best fits your book. I know it can be hard to categorize your manuscript, but a genre is neccessary. This information also will help you know what to search for in agents. Also check your word counts for your genres. (A good resource on that is here from Writer's Digest.) If you have a 250,000 word young adult novel then you've got some major work ahead of you.

Step Two:
Research Agents. 

There are a lot of agents out there and it's easy to get overwhelmed with where to being. Now since you know your genre that gives you a great starting point. So where do you even start? First, read the 'thank yous' in a novel in your genre that you like. Most authors will mention their agents. (This also serves a dual purpose of giving you a comparative title to mention.)

Personally I like QueryTracker. It lets you search agents by genre, location, and query method. You also can read comments from others who have queried. It's a great start to get names. Writer's Digest is another great resource. There's also AgentQuery, and SFWA's guide to agents. 

Now, once you've put together a list of agents to look over, here comes more work! Take your time and really go through this list of agents. Go to their agency websites and read over the guidelines. Look at their twitter feeds or other public social media sites (don't make it creepy) and read interviews with them. 

At this point I make an excel spreadsheet that tracks these things: Agent Name, Agency Name, Where to Query, and What to Send. From there I divide agents into three categories: favs, awesome, and great. My favs are the agents I dream of working with and I think we'd be a perfect fit together. The awesomes are agents that I'm excited about working with but for some reason, they aren't a fav. These reasons can be simple as 'brand new agent' or 'isn't on twitter, just things that knock them down a pinch. The 'greats' are just one notch below the 'awesomes.' Again, usually it comes down to small reasons, nothing major. 

Step Three:
Keep Researching.

Seriously. Research, research, research. You don't want to end up with a bad agent or a scam artist so take your time. Check out preditors and editors to see if there are any red flags raised about that agent or agency. SFWA has a great breakdown of warning signs of a bad agent. Check them on Preditors and Editors. 

You also can take some time to explore the magical Manuscript Wishlist. This is an awesome resource started on twitter under #MSWL where agents and editors post about things they're looking for. (They even have a great website.) You might find one of the agents you're interested in posted about looking for a novel just like yours, neat! This may bump them from an awesome to a fav. It's a good way to see if there are any agents really looking for your kind of story. 

Step Four:
Write A Query.

Okay, there are dozens of resources on queries (like the incredible queryshark which you should read extensively) to learn about how to write one. Write one and get feedback. If you have the means, take a class and get a critique. (LitReactor has some great opportunities as does Writer's Digest.) Share your query and get feedback. Let people who have no idea what your book is about read over it. Does it make sense to them? 

Step Five:
Write A Synopsis. 

I hate writing a synopsis more than writing a query letter. A synopsis ties the whole plot up in a neat package. Not every agent will want a synopsis but enough will that you should go ahead and get it together. Get feedback and help on this too. Take your time.  Here are some great resources on writing a synopsis:

• Back to Basics: Writing a Novel Synopsis
• 6 Steps for Writing a Book Synopsis
• Synopsis Writing
• How To Write A Book Synopsis

Step Six:
QUERY

I recommend sending out batches of ten-ish queries at a time. Send a few to your favs, a few to your awesomes, and a few to your greats. Don't burn all your favs on your first batch. Now you track responses. Add more columns to your excel sheet: date sent, response date, result. 
When I get a form rejection I mark it all down and then black out that row on my sheet so I don't see it anymore. After you've marked it on your list, send out another one. However, if you're getting nothing but form rejections then it's time to go back to step four and try again. See if you can make your query stronger. A solid query should be getting some requests. 

Step Seven:
Keep Working. 

Just because you're querying doesn't mean you need to stop working on anything. Start on a new project and keep yourself busy. Writing and publishing is a lot of waiting for a response. Keep busy and don't fret yourself into an early grave. 

And that's it! Easy, right? (hahahahahahah)

My Hopes for You in 2017

2016 was a doozy for a lot of people for a lot of reasons. It's been a rocky 12 months for a lot of people and the breath of air at the beginning of the new year is welcomed and needed. So here's what I hope for you for 2017. 

I hope that you do something that makes you laugh so much your sides hurt and tears stream down your face. I hope you're laughing with a group of your favorite people feeling human and like the physical embodiment of helium. 

I hope you read and write things that challenge you. Don't read your same favorites over and over again in 2016. Read an author who is nothing like you. Write a story you've been afraid to tell. Push yourself out of your comfort zone and see what new wonders the world has to show you. 

Be kind to everyone you meet. The world is filled with people suffering with things we never know about. Don't add any weight to anyone else's life and try to help carry weight when you can. 

But don't mistake kindness with silence. Kindness is offering a hand when someone is knocked down. Kindness is not walking away in silence when someone needs your help. When you see racism, sexism, xenophobia, and hate in all its form, I hope you turn the spotlight on it. Tell hate that you see it, point it out to everyone around you and watch it wither. Hate thrives in the dark so don't let your silence be its fertilizer. 

I hope that you find your footing in anything you're struggling with. Whether it's with your budget, your relationships, your career, your home, whatever it is, I hope that you find the path that you've been searching for. Just remember that it's not going to be the easiest one, walk farther to end up where your heart longs to be. 

I really hope that you get rest. The world is so constantly go, go, go that it's almost impossible to not get washed into the current of busy-ness. The 'hustle harder' mentality is burning you mentally, physically and spiritually. I hope that you take the chance to sit down and take a breath. Enjoy a bubble bath, go on a walk, take a nap. The world will still be here when you get up. 

Reach out. Despite the ease of digital communication, it's easy to lose touch with people. Take 5 minutes out of your day to send a friend a nice tweet, a text, a Facebook message or a call. We are all on this ball of mud together, we might as well find a friend. 

I hope that you keep track of the good things that happen to you this year. The bad things fester in our memories, but there are moments of joy and beauty even in the awfulness. 2016 was filled with terribleness but there were moments of brightness, even if it's just something as simple as PokemonGo coming into our lives. (Team Instinct!)

Most of all, I hope 2017 brings you closer to your goals and to the person you were always meant to be. 

I'll be cheering you on. 

The Goals of Future You

Tis the season where every other word I see in my inbox is about setting goals and making big changes for 2017. And that's all well and fine. I actually love setting new years resolutions and have set rituals of spending the 1st of the new year setting out my goals and filling in my calendar. I enjoy it, and it gives me a rush. But a big part of that is on the simple idea that future me will be better than today me. 

I really think super highly of future me, the me of tomorrow doesn't splurge on that extra book or three, she doesn't eat entire pints of ice cream in one sitting and she always gets up early to workout, drink lemon water, and write before going to her job where she sails through the day with ease. Future me might be the best fantasy novel I've ever written. 

It's a well documented concept that we think our future selves will be better prepared to handle things, we procrastinate projects until the night before because we somehow think that we will wake up tomorrow with the willpower or skill set. But we don't. We go to bed and we wake as mostly the same person. Huge changes don't happen overnight, they happen one decision at a time done day by day.

It's an obvious thing. One everyone claims to know and understand. Of course you don't just wake up 50 pounds lighter (and if you do, go to the doctor asap cause that ain't right) and suddenly have a new life. We define ourselves. in the big moments that take our breath away but you are the result of the small, mundane choices you make every day. 

Does that mean I'm not going to set resolutions this year?

Uh no. I'm setting goals, marking down big resolutions and planning to generally continue kicking ass. This time, I'm just doing it with the knowledge that present me and future me are in this together.